Courageous Creativity
I am an artist. I also enjoy speaking out and expressing myself. Both require courage. However, I was not aware that creativity and courage co-existed within my heart until Lynda Marvin, a friend in Maine, emailed me and thanked me for my “creative courage” in response to a photo I posted about the emerging Bridgit. She emphasized that sculpting stone was less forgiving than either clay or oils. I held my breath when I read her words, “creative courage.” On reflection, I realize that my soul is comfortable with the phrase; yet my “little self” shied away.
Later I searched my memory for an example of a woman who embodied both courage and creativity. Sadly, I found none in my ancestral lineage. Then Hildegard of Bingen beckoned me from nine centuries ago. She feels like part of my spiritual family. When I taught with Matthew Fox, I meditated with her mandalas, listened to her liturgical hymns, feasted on her visionary theology, marveled at her poetry, and prayed to her. I also used many of her herbal remedies. One of her quotations that I memorized long ago reads,
“Love abounds in all things,
excels from the depths to beyond the stars,
Is lovingly disposed to all things.”
I grew up in a family where neither creativity nor music was valued.
Although I was both an imaginative and intuitive child, I discounted both as frivolous. College was serious business. No room for creativity or courage. I knew how to memorize facts and theories and my intuition served me well—so well that I graduated college in three years with high honors.
In my thirties, the death of my 14-year-old son, Mike, thrust me into grief and later my spiritual journey. I yearned to understand the meaning of life and my own soul purpose. Creativity, intuition, and healing were points on my inner compass. Looking back, I appreciate how I embodied courage as I affirmed the power of creativity in my daily life. Two years ago I challenged myself to put “Cosmic Catalyst” on my business card.
During a recent Friends Meeting, I felt more inspired to write more about courageous creativity than to build silence. My heart spilled out these words as I breathed and befriended courageous creativity:
Courageous creativity means I approach the 89 pounds of soapstone that will emerge as Bridgit with an attitude of collaboration as I await instruction and inspiration.
Courageous creativity means that I am more comfortable with being curious than thinking that I already know how the future wishes to evolve through me.
Courageous creativity means I align more intimately with my eternal soul and reassure my temporal ego that there is room for all.
Courageous creativity means I consciously make time to be alone and receptive to the creative forces that surround me.
Courageous creativity means I trust and surrender and trust and surrender.
Courageous creativity means I express my emerging truth from my heart when I feel called to speak and I also nourish silence when my heart asks me to be quiet.
I feel a combination of amazement and amusement when I wrap my heart and arms around my unique expression of courageous creativity. Synergy erupts.
I giggle and imagine Hildegard and Bridgit joining the dance of courageous creativity. Then I bow in reverence.
