This is the first blog I have written in several months.  For more than two years, I concentrated my energy and attention on writing my 8th book, Soul Befriending. My twenty-seven month “pregnancy” is now officially over. The manuscript has covers, a spine and a bar code. I have mailed autographed copies and entertained at book signings.

Today I am aware that my consciousness has gradually shifted from work mode to relaxation mode. Upon reflection, I wonder how my writing experience might have been different if I had consciously included relaxation and pleasure while I organized chapters, edited, and proofed my writing.

I inherited a Puritanical compulsion to work hard and delay pleasure, play, and relaxation until I had completed a project.  While writing Soul Befriending, I often fantasized about a spontaneous picnic, a dance on the beach, meandering in the rain, or creating snow angels in the snowdrifts. Yet I plodded along with writing and re-writing the book. A former partner once told me that I was the hardest working person he ever met. I did not believe him then. I do now.

Although I intentionally set an alarm clock to ring at ten minutes before each hour to remind me to take a body break, it was never enough time to evoke leisure or to laugh at myself when I remembered how I had written “authentic elf” instead of “authentic self.”  Compressed leisure did not satisfy my need for relaxation.

As I continue to muse and journal about opening to pleasure and leisure, I wonder why I did not bring memories of pleasure and leisure into this present life time from past lifetimes?  For sure, I can align my future self with the emerging values of leisure and pleasure. When my grandchildren visit, I always ask, “What is your pleasure for this morning, afternoon and evening?” Then we enjoy the myriad ways they instantly respond to my invitation to play. Now I ask the same question to myself at various times during the day and make it my practice to extend pleasure and leisure to myself. I even made a list of my pleasure mates! My newly-born practice of pleasure alerted me to the existence of my bliss body that I now appreciate always co-existed with my demanding work ethic.

As I reflect upon a future writing project, I vow to blend in delight with depth as I commit myself to a more leisurely work schedule. I am curious how writing will flow when my inner split between work and pleasure is healed. For the time being, I will befriend relaxation and when the inspiration to write happens, I will co-create with pleasure and leisure. I promise.